Couples Hobbies?

[Deleted member 12904]

I was just curious if any of you wouldn't mind sharing a hobby you and your partner enjoy doing together? My main interests have been being outside with some type of motorsport like the SXS dirtbike or jeeps in the past but my wife is basically scared of all of those activities and doesn't enjoy them at all. Looking for some ideas of things non motorsports related.

 

[bryson]

Yep, I've got some ideas.


Sorry, you had to know there were kids like me in the audience...

 

[DaveB]

Fishing, and rock hounding are two non motor sports my wife likes to do with me, luckily she likes jeeping too.

 

[Herzog]

I spent some time mountain biking with other people's wives last summer. *cough* Kurt *cough* Kiel *cough*

 

[Skylinerider]

Geocaching, hiking, fishing, shooting, etc.

 

[Cody]

Beer and wine making.

 

[Gravy]

We like working on the house together and snowboarding.

 

[Marsh99]

Trying new restaurants around town.

 

[Hickey]

Trying new restaurants around town.

That's a rough one in Grantsville. Casa Del Ray is the only real choice, and Tooele is slim picking.

Deviant, my wife is also terrified of offroad stuff.

 

[Kiel]

I'd recommend having Shane go mountain biking with your wife while you do something fun. Just kidding you'll just cave like me and get a mountain bike this year, which has been pretty good so far

 

[thefirstzukman]

What did you do before you were married? To me it sounds odd for someone who is married to be asking this question. Before my wife and I got married 25 years ago we used to go camping and spend time in the outdoors, now we go camping and spend time in the outdoors....Plus we go 4 wheeling and off roading and shooting and we travel, we go hiking and backpacking a lot also. I fish and she hangs out while I fish, I hunt and she goes with me. She doesnt hunt or fish but she is a part of the process and she enjoys it.

 

[rholbrook]

You are going about this all wrong. Just tell your wife that there is only one other thing that you think you could get into with her and that you would be more than happy to go to Barnes and Noble to get the book on Kama Sutra. She will let you ride your 300 and wheel any time you want without her.

 

[Deleted member 12904]

What did you do before you were married? To me it sounds odd for someone who is married to be asking this question. Before my wife and I got married 25 years ago we used to go camping and spend time in the outdoors, now we go camping and spend time in the outdoors....Plus we go 4 wheeling and off roading and shooting and we travel, we go hiking and backpacking a lot also. I fish and she hangs out while I fish, I hunt and she goes with me. She doesnt hunt or fish but she is a part of the process and she enjoys it.

She used to be into jeeps and off road but rolled a quad that ended in 5 surgeries then I bought her a rhino that she was scared to drive so her "experienced" friend offer to drive the first time and rolled it in 10 minutes. So basically she has been over Motorsports since like 08. I took my boy all weekend in the SXS and she is feeling left out because it's becoming more and more normal. Just looking for some new ideas since all I think about motors and gears

 

[thefirstzukman]

She used to be into jeeps and off road but rolled a quad that ended in 5 surgeries then I bought her a rhino that she was scared to drive so her "experienced" friend offer to drive the first time and rolled it in 10 minutes. So basically she has been over Motorsports since like 08. I took my boy all weekend in the SXS and she is feeling left out because it's becoming more and more normal. Just looking for some new ideas since all I think about motors and gears

That's a tough one, i would have a hard time with that. If my wife decided that she no longer wanted to do what we had always done I would probably decide that it was time to go our separate ways. My parents didn't do much as a couple while I was growing up, I look back and can see that neither one of them was very happy.

Good Luck

 

[jeeper]

We struggle with this issue also. The wife has reeled back on her adventure to to safety concerns. The kids are getting old enough to decide they don't like bouncing around in the back seat offroad. The wife and I have ALWAYS done things together, and lately I do my thing and She does hers. I don't like it at all.

We have had to learn new things.. The paddle boards were good. We are trying more sight seeing adventures instead of rock crawling. Visiting new-to-us places (state parks, national parks, etc)

 

[Greg]

How about simple stock-4x4 dirt road exploring & camping? Nothing crazy, just exploring the desert. Head out to the Deep Creeks for weekend, do some hiking & poking around with the kids & wife.

 

[sixstringsteve]

I'm a big believer in therapy even if you have the best relationship in the world. Olympic athletes, some of the healthiest people in the world, see more doctors than anyone else. Even healthy marriages can use a periodic checkup. In fact, typically it's the people that aren't willing to go to therapy that need it the most. There's no shame in therapy; it's helped us a ton. I have some close family members who started seeing a counselor, and their lives improved dramatically. My wife and I decided "we're happy, and we don't feel like our marriage is suffering, but if it's helped others, it can probably help us too. Let's go anyway just to see if we can learn something." We learned a lot, and it was a great thing for our marriage. Now, when we realize it's been a while, we go back to get a tune-up, before things get bad. As a society, we don't have to convince people of the value of exercise and seeing a physician regularly; but we struggle to give the same message for emotional health. Think of it as an oil change every 3000-5000k rather than waiting for the engine to sieze.

I'm not implying that your marriage is broken; I think everyone could benefit from a GOOD counselor. There are some really crappy counselors out there, but a good one is worth their weight in gold.




I don't blame your wife for not wanting to be in a sxs or motorized rig after those experiences. That's gotta be tough for you though, I feel for ya.

When my wife and I got married we didn't have a ton of hobbies we enjoyed together. Two things really helped us:

1) a weekly date night
2) planning something exciting every month so we had something to look forward to together.

Now we enjoy doing just about everything together: hiking, backpacking, car camping, eating out, traveling, mountain biking, kayaking, SUPing, eating lunch in a park, making videos together, community service, you name it. Don't be afraid to try doing something she loves, even if it's girly, like yoga, or dancing, going to a museum, or something like that. Our marriage isn't perfect, and we keep finding ways to improve, but we've been very happy for the past 11 years.

 

[mbryson]

She used to be into jeeps and off road but rolled a quad that ended in 5 surgeries then I bought her a rhino that she was scared to drive so her "experienced" friend offer to drive the first time and rolled it in 10 minutes. So basically she has been over Motorsports since like 08. I took my boy all weekend in the SXS and she is feeling left out because it's becoming more and more normal. Just looking for some new ideas since all I think about motors and gears

I've had to back off a little in my motorized activities when my wife felt like that. I can't lose it completely as I'll just find some other gear head thing to do. We had to find something we could do together

That's a tough one, i would have a hard time with that. If my wife decided that she no longer wanted to do what we had always done I would probably decide that it was time to go our separate ways. My parents didn't do much as a couple while I was growing up, I look back and can see that neither one of them was very happy.

Good Luck

i know people I care about a lot that kind of have a "hollow" marriage. I'm pretty sure I couldn't do it that way but they are committed to staying together but don't really seem "together" from where I sit? Not really my business but I hope there is more to their relationship than I see

We struggle with this issue also. The wife has reeled back on her adventure to to safety concerns. The kids are getting old enough to decide they don't like bouncing around in the back seat offroad. The wife and I have ALWAYS done things together, and lately I do my thing and She does hers. I don't like it at all.

We have had to learn new things.. The paddle boards were good. We are trying more sight seeing adventures instead of rock crawling. Visiting new-to-us places (state parks, national parks, etc)

we have went through periods like this. I think it's kind of natural as we cycle through life? I think it important to communicate more during those times about the differences and LISTEN to what your wife is trying to tell you. It's hard for me to get through my thick skull that sometimes she's really doing what she wants to do and she's happy with how things are. Listening is a skill that I vary in competence on....


i did did just ask her what hobbies we share....she answered sex, and sex and vacationing.....sounds good to me

 

[Tonkaman]

How about simple stock-4x4 dirt road exploring & camping? Nothing crazy, just exploring the desert. Head out to the Deep Creeks for weekend, do some hiking & poking around with the kids & wife.

This was my initial thought. As a kid my most meme table days were just driving around average roads off to do average things.

Try learning from some things from her. Have her teach you how to fly fish better. Work out in the wood shop together on something fun.

Elaina and I came from living a busy lifestyle downtown. That part of us is still hidden away in there and usually only shows its face in date nights. We enjoy going to festivals, art shows, concerts, clubs, movie pre-screenings, expos, or just trying new foods.

The point is what your doing doesn't have to be "exciting" because it sounds like you both have different levels of where that stops being fun. Just go out and experience all the different things life has to offer. The fun part isn't always what your doing that night it's watching the other person react to it, and learn from it.

Clear as mud?

 

[CYoung]

Kayaking, canoeing, exploring in our aged Scout, shooting, geocacheing. Going to Costco for samples.