Don't you just love....

[mbryson]

....emails to a large group that start out

Team,



??? (I have no idea why that's annoying to me, but for some reason it is?)

 

[ID Bronco]

If it is from your little league coach I think it is totally appropriate. If not, I delete them.

 

[Zombie]

LOL...
I only start emails to the group that I manage with "Team," when I am annoyed at them, and want to annoy them back.

I thought I was the only one who hated that...

 

[Caleb]

Yeah, every email from our CEO starts out that way...even if he's just emailing you.

 

[Bart]

Hmmmm, I'll have to start using that.

 

[Stephen]

Team,

I just wanted to let everyone know that I appreciate all your hard work. RME wouldn't have been able to grown and become such a wonderful community without your efforts. That being said, we're going to have to make a few changes to our lineup. As everyone knows, there is no 'I' in team. And if we intend to remain competitive in the web wheeling world we're going to have to... well lets call it 'make some trades'.

First of all, Cody McKendrick has made some wonderful contributions here at RME over the years, but we feel that he has outgrown us and it would be best for both of us if he were allowed to expand his horizons elsewhere. In addition, the gravitational field his head generates has been causing some problems with our servers lately. We've enjoyed Cody, and we wish him well in his future endeavors.

Second, Brett Matthews. Well, I don't know if I can really put this lightly, but his lifestyle choices have come into conflict with the rest of the team here at RME. We wish him well and hope that he can find a co-op that fits his needs better.

And finally, Bryson Tsagi... Sagi.. Not Gonna Work Here Anymore.

Well team, with these changes I hope that we are able to breath some new life into RME! Keep up the good work!

Warm Regards,

Stephen Nielson

 

[mbryson]

Team,

I just wanted to let everyone know that I appreciate all your hard work. RME wouldn't have been able to grown and become such a wonderful community without your efforts. That being said, we're going to have to make a few changes to our lineup. As everyone knows, there is no 'I' in team. And if we intend to remain competitive in the web wheeling world we're going to have to... well lets call it 'make some trades'.

First of all, Cody McKendrick has made some wonderful contributions here at RME over the years, but we feel that he has outgrown us and it would be best for both of us if he were allowed to expand his horizons elsewhere. In addition, the gravitational field his head generates has been causing some problems with our servers lately. We've enjoyed Cody, and we wish him well in his future endeavors.

Second, Brett Matthews. Well, I don't know if I can really put this lightly, but his lifestyle choices have come into conflict with the rest of the team here at RME. We wish him well and hope that he can find a co-op that fits his needs better.

And finally, Bryson Tsagi... Sagi.. Not Gonna Work Here Anymore.

Well team, with these changes I hope that we are able to breath some new life into RME! Keep up the good work!

Warm Regards,

Stephen Nielson

Who are the replacements since this is a "trade"? Hoping we're getting better than a "future draft pick" or similar. Let's get a real asset!!

 

[Cody]

Well, it would only be fitting to replace Cody and Brett with true web-wheelers who don't actually participate in the activity, yet are thirsty to finally be accepted and tolerated in a social environment.

I nominate SRN and Tacoma.

 

[Stephen]

Who are the replacements since this is a "trade"? Hoping we're getting better than a "future draft pick" or similar. Let's get a real asset!!

Marc,

I appreciate your interest in this matter and I'd like to clear up my wording for you a bit. I opted to use the word 'trade' in place of 'firing' because that word is just so... harsh. Don't you think? We will not be replacing them, I was just trying to go with the 'team' motif.

Warm regards,

Stephen Nielson

 

[mbryson]

Marc,

I appreciate your interest in this matter and I'd like to clear up my wording for you a bit. I opted to use the word 'trade' in place of 'firing' because that word is just so... harsh. Don't you think? We will not be replacing them, I was just trying to go with the 'team' motif.

Warm regards,

Stephen Nielson

I think you're a knucklehead.

 

[Stephen]

Well, it would only be fitting to replace Cody and Brett with true web-wheelers who don't actually participate in the activity, yet are thirsty to finally be accepted and tolerated in a social environment.

I nominate SRN and Tacoma.

Cody,

I understand your upset, but your former teammates don't deserve your hostility. Think about it like baseball, sometimes the team has to move you down to the minors so you can refocus your energy.

Warm regards,

Stephen Nielson

P.S. Please have your desk cleaned out by the end of the day.

 

[Herzog]

And finally, Bryson Tsagi... Sagi.. Not Gonna Work Here Anymore.

I've never met this guy.

 

[Zombie]

Bryson Tsagi... Sagi.. Not Gonna Work Here Anymore.

That one was good for some coffee up my nose.

 

[Stephen]

I've never met this guy.

Shane,

Bryson was a fine employee but of late he has had trouble showing up for work. And we've always had a tough time pronouncing his name properly. If you never met him, well who cares cause he ain't around no more!

Warm regards,

Stephen Nielson

 

[Brett]

Well, it would only be fitting to replace Cody and Brett with true web-wheelers who don't actually participate in the activity, yet are thirsty to finally be accepted and tolerated in a social environment.

I nominate SRN and Tacoma.

I second Cody's nomination's! Here here!

 

[Cody]

Cody,

I understand your upset, but your former teammates don't deserve your hostility. Think about it like baseball, sometimes the team has to move you down to the minors so you can refocus your energy.

Warm regards,

Stephen Nielson

P.S. Please have your desk cleaned out by the end of the day.

Dear Stephen,

Please try and keep this civil. I understand your emotional attachment to the mop that we had to replace. The simple fact of the matter is that while you were performing the physical aspect of you janitorial duties to par, you're emotional attachment to the mop and unwillingness to allow its replacement was beginning to create health issues that had to be addressed. Perhaps in the future a more appropriate outlet for the energy spent in this misguided attempt to usurp upper level management could be your Tuesday and Thursday D & D gatherings. Perhaps your insolence will find a warmer reception around the beta nerds with which you associate.

On a side note, if you ever decide to pursue a Masters degree in History, we may consider promoting you to head of maintenance at our Magna reclamation facility. It's hard to find good help, and although your delusions can be a distraction for your coworkers, we find your dedication to the job commendable.

Kindest regards

Cody

cc: Your mother.

 

[Tacoma]

I nominate SRN and Tacoma.

Whoa!

I can't work with that French bastard. Lint from his scarf gets in my whiskey, damnit.

I appreciate the nomination, otherwise.

 

[Tacoma]

cc: Your mother.

!ROFL!! For some reason that entire post was narrated in my mind by Danny Aiello, and that was the icing on the cake. Har!

 

[Stephen]

Dear Stephen,

Please try and keep this civil. I understand your emotional attachment to the mop that we had to replace. The simple fact of the matter is that while you were performing the physical aspect of you janitorial duties to par, you're emotional attachment to the mop and unwillingness to allow its replacement was beginning to create health issues that had to be addressed. Perhaps in the future a more appropriate outlet for the energy spent in this misguided attempt to usurp upper level management could be your Tuesday and Thursday D & D gatherings. Perhaps your insolence will find a warmer reception around the beta nerds with which you associate.

On a side note, if you ever decide to pursue a Masters degree in History, we may consider promoting you to head of maintenance at our Magna reclamation facility. It's hard to find good help, and although your delusions can be a distraction for your coworkers, we find your dedication to the job commendable.

Kindest regards

Cody

cc: Your mother.

Cody, Cody, Cody. You are the biggest a$$hole I know. My mother? Really? That was just low.

 

[Cody]

don't start **** you can't finish.