It's crazy how our brains deal with trauma, I'm glad to hear she's going to counseling. You might consider going to counseling as well (I'm serious). If the stress is enough to cause physical pain in your back/neck, it might be worth looking at. I'm a big fan of counseling, but it's not for everyone, and some counselors suck and others are incredible.
I also have a great massage therapist in Alpine if you're ever in need. She's very talented, and rather than just rub lotion all over you, she actually targets the problems and works to eliminate them. My carpal tunnel has gone away after 3 visits to her. I thought I'd have to live with it for the rest of my life. Anyway, best of luck whatever you choose to do.