My Jeep has always been a chick magnet......

[Brett]

In a fight against Vin Diesel, Jack Bauer would win with 23 hours & 59 minutes to spare.

 

[Brett]

Season 5 of 24 was supposed to be Jack Bauer fighting Chuck Norris and Vin Diesel. This idea was abandoned when Jack defeated them and nothing else could be found to fill the other 23 hours and 59 minutes.

 

[Cody]

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

 

[Brett]

Jack Bauer can heat a burrito so hot that even Jack Bauer cannot hold it.

 

[StrobeNGH]

Jack Bauer's crap smells like roses. Jack dares you to disagree.

 

[bryson]

Wow. That is funny stuff.

 

[RWH]

Jack Bauer can heat a burrito so hot that even Jack Bauer cannot hold it.

Chuck Norris can heat a burrito so hot, that even chuck norris can't eat or hold it. BUT then he eats it, because #$@! YOU he's Chuck NORRIS!

 

[Bone Down]

you guys are killing me this stuff and Conan and the WTR lever makes me laugh ever time.

 

[Brett]

Wow. That is funny stuff.

Why does Jack Bauer run through firefights standing completely erect? Because God will not let his greatest creation die...Jack Bauer knows this.


Jack bauer taught David Hasselhoff how to swim.


Jack Bauer's gun is actually a water pistol, but the water shoots out in the form of bullets. Why? Because the gun is being held by Jack ****ing Bauer.

 

[StrobeNGH]

Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.

Jack Bauer's favorite color is violet, because it sounds like violent.

When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer ****ing hates lemonade.

After 7 minutes of interrogation at the hands of Jack Bauer, Tom Cruise admitted that he was gay.

 

[PierCed_3]

Hijack!!!! Holy Random Post's

 

[StrobeNGH]

Hijack!!!! Holy Random Post's

How dare you use terrorist terminology to describe anything done in Jack's name!!!

I'd be checkin' my 6 for signs of Jack!

 

[Jeremy]

i am sorry but you guys are pathetic, everybody knows Frank Martin craped out all three of them after a nice french toast breakfast at the IHOP.


Frank said " let there be god" and god said " let there be light"

 

[PierCed_3]

How dare you use terrorist terminology to describe anything done in Jack's name!!!

I'd be checkin' my 6 for signs of Jack!