greenjeep
Cause it's green, duh!
- Location
- Moab Local!
The Ant and the Grasshopper: 2 Scenarios
*OLD VERSION*:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the
cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
************************************************************
*MODERN VERSION:*
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press
conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the
shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home
with atable filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp
contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and
everybody cries when they sing, "its Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's
house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome."
Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry
King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both
call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-
Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined
for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having
nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the
government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in
a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-
parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last
bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just
happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't
maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found
dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken
over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be very very careful how you vote.
*OLD VERSION*:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the
cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
************************************************************
*MODERN VERSION:*
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press
conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the
shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home
with atable filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp
contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and
everybody cries when they sing, "its Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's
house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome."
Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry
King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both
call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-
Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined
for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having
nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the
government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in
a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-
parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last
bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just
happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't
maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found
dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken
over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be very very careful how you vote.
