BlueWolfFab
Running Behind
- Location
- Eagle Mountain
Cells be like:
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Mitosis time
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O
8
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Mitosis timeo
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8
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Lame Joke Thread
- Thread starter mesha
- Start date
BlueWolfFab
Running Behind
- Location
- Eagle Mountain
I had sex with a girl last week for an hour and 15 seconds.
Thanks daylight savings!
Thanks daylight savings!
BlueWolfFab
Running Behind
- Location
- Eagle Mountain
I asked Siri why I was still single, and she opened my front camera
rholbrook
Well-Known Member
- Location
- Kaysville, Ut
Sitting around the campfire with 5 high school boys. This was the joke told
What does KFC and a women have in common? Once you take away the breast and the legs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in
What does KFC and a women have in common? Once you take away the breast and the legs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in
Tonkaman
Well-Known Member
- Location
- West Jordan
This is awesome!
- Location
- Stinkwater
- Location
- The Village of Kay
I love a good Monty Python joke!
- Location
- Stinkwater
How to fall down the stairs.
Step 1:
Step 2:
Step 3:
Step 5:
Step 9:
Step 17 step 23 step 28 step 33 step 40 step 48...
Step 1:
Step 2:
Step 3:
Step 5:
Step 9:
Step 17 step 23 step 28 step 33 step 40 step 48...
- Location
- The Village of Kay
What do you call an old snowman?
Water!
Why are ghosts such bad liars?
Because you can see right through them.
Why is Santa always so happy?
He likes to live in the present!
How do you catch a whole school of fish?
With bookworms.
What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
Why didn’t the zombie go to school?
He felt rotten!
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.
How do mountains stay warm in winter?
Snowcaps.
Why do artists constantly feel cold?
Because they’re surrounded by drafts.
Why did the pony get sent to his room?
He wouldn’t stop horsing around.
What do you call a cow that eats your grass?
A lawn moo-er.
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?
That hit the spot!
Why can’t a leopard hide?
Because he’s always spotted!
Why should you not let a bear operate the remote?
He will keep pressing the paws button.
What is a robot’s favorite snack?
Computer chips.
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner is on me!
What does a nosey pepper do?
Gets jalapeño business!
Why did the banana go to the hospital?
He was peeling really bad.
Why did Mickey Mouse take a trip into space?
He was looking for his buddy, Pluto.
What are the two things you can’t have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner.
Where do you learn to make banana splits?
At sundae school.
What did the limestone say to the geologist?
Don’t take me for granite!
What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep?
A stega-snore-us.
Why do seagulls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay, they’d be bagels!
What bone will a dog never eat?
A Trombone.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
To eat the chickens on the other side.
Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
Lack of concentration.
When will the little snake arrive?
I don’t know, but he won’t be long.
What’s the biggest moth in the world?
A mammoth.
What do you get if you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.
What type of markets do dogs avoid?
Flea markets!
What do music and chickens have in common?
Bach, Bach, Bach!
Why aren’t dogs good dancers?
They have two left feet.
What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A do-you-think-he-saw-us.
What did one penny say to another penny?
We make cents.
What kind of lion never roars?
A dandelion!
Why did the clock go to the principal’s office?
For tocking too much.
Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold hard cash!
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
Why did the man run around his bed?
He was trying to catch up on sleep!
Why do dragons sleep during the day?
So they can fight knights!
Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
Why is the grass so dangerous?
It’s full of blades.
Why is it so windy inside a sports arena?
All those fans.
Why did the student eat his homework?
Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm.
Water!
Why are ghosts such bad liars?
Because you can see right through them.
Why is Santa always so happy?
He likes to live in the present!
How do you catch a whole school of fish?
With bookworms.
What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
Why didn’t the zombie go to school?
He felt rotten!
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.
How do mountains stay warm in winter?
Snowcaps.
Why do artists constantly feel cold?
Because they’re surrounded by drafts.
Why did the pony get sent to his room?
He wouldn’t stop horsing around.
What do you call a cow that eats your grass?
A lawn moo-er.
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?
That hit the spot!
Why can’t a leopard hide?
Because he’s always spotted!
Why should you not let a bear operate the remote?
He will keep pressing the paws button.
What is a robot’s favorite snack?
Computer chips.
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner is on me!
What does a nosey pepper do?
Gets jalapeño business!
Why did the banana go to the hospital?
He was peeling really bad.
Why did Mickey Mouse take a trip into space?
He was looking for his buddy, Pluto.
What are the two things you can’t have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner.
Where do you learn to make banana splits?
At sundae school.
What did the limestone say to the geologist?
Don’t take me for granite!
What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep?
A stega-snore-us.
Why do seagulls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay, they’d be bagels!
What bone will a dog never eat?
A Trombone.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
To eat the chickens on the other side.
Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
Lack of concentration.
When will the little snake arrive?
I don’t know, but he won’t be long.
What’s the biggest moth in the world?
A mammoth.
What do you get if you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.
What type of markets do dogs avoid?
Flea markets!
What do music and chickens have in common?
Bach, Bach, Bach!
Why aren’t dogs good dancers?
They have two left feet.
What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A do-you-think-he-saw-us.
What did one penny say to another penny?
We make cents.
What kind of lion never roars?
A dandelion!
Why did the clock go to the principal’s office?
For tocking too much.
Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold hard cash!
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
Why did the man run around his bed?
He was trying to catch up on sleep!
Why do dragons sleep during the day?
So they can fight knights!
Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
Why is the grass so dangerous?
It’s full of blades.
Why is it so windy inside a sports arena?
All those fans.
Why did the student eat his homework?
Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm.
smartass_kid
Well-Known Member
- Location
- Cottonwood Heights, UT
likely an old joke but the first I have heard of it.
I picked up a hitchhiker the other night and he seemed surprised that I would pick up someone I didn't know.
He said, "thanks but how do you know I'm not a serial killer?"
I laughed and told him the chances of TWO serial killers being in one car is kinda crazy.
I picked up a hitchhiker the other night and he seemed surprised that I would pick up someone I didn't know.
He said, "thanks but how do you know I'm not a serial killer?"
I laughed and told him the chances of TWO serial killers being in one car is kinda crazy.
4x4_Welder
Well-Known Member
- Location
- Twin Falls, ID
At least that's better than those diarrhea jokes that just run on and on-
ID Bronco
Registered User
- Location
- Idaho Falls, ID
(not sure if it's in this thread somewhere else)
Diarrhea is hereditary.......................it runs in your jeans.
4x4_Welder
Well-Known Member
- Location
- Twin Falls, ID
Man, this thread kinda took a dump.
- Location
- Stinkwater
That's a shitty thing to say.
4x4_Welder
Well-Known Member
- Location
- Twin Falls, ID
Well now I feel crappy. Hopefully someone can come in and lift us up above these foul winds.
- Location
- Eagle Mountain, Utah
I laughed harder then I should have at that.
Noahfecks
El Destructo!
- Location
- Glenwoody Springs, CO
Why do some places charge $2 to put air in your tires?
......Inflation
......Inflation