Sit or stand? The great debate.

[Brad J]

This is just so wrong & funny at the same time.

John:
I had a friend who used to always stand to wipe. It wasn't because of how he was raised, or race or anything like that. No, he stood so he could check out his handiwork and if he was suitably impressed, he would move to the next stall over and wipe there leaving his magnificence for all to see.

 

[sawtooth4x4]

Do they do Laser Hair Removal for Butt Hole Hair?

I mean that would cut down on my issues with poop and dingle berries a lot!!!!

On second thought, that probably hurts a lot!!!

 

[STAG]

This is mind boggling again. I have a fairly hairy buttcrack but I've never had issues with dingleberries!

 

[sawtooth4x4]

you must not be eating enough CORN!

 

[rockdog]

This is for rockdog. He wanted to be entertained. Never let it be said that any board I hang out on isn't entertaining.

http://deadspin.com/5424415/sitters-vs-standers--the-great-wipe-hope

Kevin, I just noticed this!! I know, I'm brain dead! Thank you! You have made my day!

 

[rockdog]

As to sit to shit? Sit or stand, the best damn thing ever invented for sphincter cleaning is the everyday fresh wipes from Walmart. They get right to the root of the shitty sphincter problem.

 

[STAG]

Oh what a disaster. I just tried it "the other way" and only ended up making my back sore and getting some poo on my thumb. DON'T EXPERIMENT WITH THE OTHER OPTION!

 

[sawtooth4x4]

I would never try it standing up. its too hard to keep the gun from falling out of my pants

 

[mierdota]

This is one of the funniest posts ever, if any of you that have posted on here ever buy any parts or anything from me if I have a weird look on my face it's probably because I'm thinking of your hairy butt holes, bodaggets or the manner in which you wipe. Thanks for the good laugh

 

[Kevin B.]

This is one of the funniest posts ever,

You didn't read Pelygroso's "how do I put my wife into labor" thread.

 

[phatfoto]

I'm going to weigh in here as well (no jokes Tacoma about my weight!!!).

As one who never really solved the how to of doing it like the Japanese, I never made a mess, but there were close calls. So, I guess I'm more a "sitter". I saw a stander fall when the ship we were on rocked at the wrong time for him... Product of environement I reckon. In my case, these days since I broke my back, I do whatever works. But my flexibility is lost where I need it for these sorts of things. Front to back, back to front, front reach, back reach, whatever I can mange that visit. And, I'm a fan of wet wipes for final cleanings. But they are tough to flush and bad for septic systems. Disposal, well...

I HATE tight public toilet stalls. Depending on which side is tightest, depends on how I can manage. Not fun.

I am a TP roll off the bottom sort of guy, not the top. Used to piss my FatherinLaw off by switching whenever we visited...

And considering there was a time I couldn't, I'll remind you all of one of my 4 truths. Any day you can wipe your own butt, is a good day...

OMG, this is funny, isn't it?

 

[Herzog]

You don't look at a weld to make sure it was done correctly? An artist admires their final product.

 

[pELYgroso]

Wow, I had zero idea that there was such a thing as standing to wipe. My mind is blown. I can't imagine getting it all while standing. Plus, if you released a rather gushy black pickle and you stand, closing up your butt cheeks a little, you're going to spread the poo into a larger area to clean. That's just wrong. Sitting is the only way to go. Edit: I just simulated this really quick, and I guess I don't sit, but lean forward onto my feet, still in the sitting position and reach back. then a quick peek of the tp between the legs to check if your clean, and your good. Oh, and wet wipes are a must. If you don't currently use them, I challenge you to wipe yourself clean without them, and then use a wet wipe. Something along the lines of "holy crap, that's a lot of crap that I've been leaving on my butt." Will go through your mind. Your post-poo butt will be the cleanest it's ever been since the last time you're mom wiped your butt when you were a baby, and your life will be changed. You're welcome. I expect a "thank you pelygroso" thread to be started in the next couple days. You dry-wipers are about to be amazed.

 

[Kevin B.]

I gotta say, I don't understand this wet-wipes thing. I will admit to infrequent occasions of irregularity when I could see the benefit of a wet wipe, but you guys using them all the time need to get a little more fiber in your diet I think.

 

[pELYgroso]

I gotta say, I don't understand this wet-wipes thing. I will admit to infrequent occasions of irregularity when I could see the benefit of a wet wipe, but you guys using them all the time need to get a little more fiber in your diet I think.

Just try it, but be prepared for a life changing moment. You may experience the urge to cry out of happiness.

 

[blznnp]

great thread kevin, I did not know how much of a debate this is, and never though about standing, and never will try it.

As for the wet wipes, they have actually been causing problems in the sewer systems. They say they are flushable but the problem is, is that they are causing issues with some pumps in the sewer systems due to them not breaking apart or dissolving and making them work harder and frying them. Its actually causing tons of money due to how many people are using the wet wipes.

 

[UNSTUCK]

How did this make it to three pages?

 

[phatfoto]

I'm in agreement pELYgroso... Not that I would call that a life changing moment... But because of my lost flexibilty, caused by my life changing moment, a final wipe with wet never hurts. And as I mentioned above, I wouldn't flush the wet wipes. Its not any different than your wife or SO not flushing her monthly items, but tossing in the trash. (SOME toss in the toilet, some throw in the trash, just using that as an example!!!) I HOPE you use liners in your bathroom cans... And for the record, I carry wet wipes in my work truck...