Lame Joke Thread

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I met a lady in the parking lot the other day, who said 'is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'
I said 'both, get in the van!'




I can tell from the shoes a women wears if we are going to have sex.
If she wears high heals, it's going to happen. If she wears tennis shoes, I'll never catch her..
 
I met a blind man the other day, and I asked how he became blind. He said it was a motorboating accident.
I asked what happened.
He said 'she didn't tell me she had piercings.'
 
jeeper said:
I met a lady in the parking lot the other day, who said 'is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'
I said 'both, get in the van!'




I can tell from the shoes a women wears if we are going to have sex.
If she wears high heals, it's going to happen. If she wears tennis shoes, I'll never catch her..
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So dark. Just terrible. I'll use these.
 
Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.
 
Why was Oedipus against profanity? Because he kisses his mother with that mouth.




^ That's the stupidest mother****ing joke you'll ever hear.
 
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