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A fiftyish woman was at home happily jumping on her bed and squealing with delight. Her husband watches her for a while and asks, "Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look? What's the matter with you?" The woman continues to bounce on the bed and says, "I don't care. I just came from...

Harry Potter? I think the dude's into ceramics. :confused:

Everything will be fine. I promise!!!

Is she 18 yet??? I'd hit that..... ;)

An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "What is this Father?" The father, never having seen an elevator responded, "Son, I...

I take it the Jeep parts sale is over??? :rofl: Sorry!!! I just had to ask. :D I'm glad you're okay Dave.

In pharmacology, all drugs have two names - a trade name and a generic name. For example, the trade name Tylenol(r) is acetaminophen. Aleve(r) is known as naproxen, Amoxil(r) is amoxicillin, and Advil(r) is ibuprophen. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra(r). After...

Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: "Two Prostitutes -- $50.00" A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove the sign or go to jail. Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying: "J e s u...

A Guy Goes To A Supermarket And Notices A Beautiful Blonde Wave At Him And Say's Hello. He's Rather Taken Aback, Because He Can't Place Where He Knows Her From, So He Says "do You Know Me?" To Which She Replies, "i Think You're The Father Of One Of My Kids." Now He Thinks Back To The Only...

A 90-year old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better... I have an 18-year old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think of that?" The doctor replied, "I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season. One day he was in a hurry and picked up his umbrella...

In Utah??? I'm sorry!!! I think you'll be getting to know Wendover quite well here real soon. Oh yeah, welcome!!!

Big party!!! :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:

Utah??? :eek2: J/K :D

Must have been at the same party. Is DNA testing going to be required??? :eek2: Congrats!!! :D

My house was built out of would...... :redneck:

We still have these??? :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Flag Rules and Regulations

Personally, I condone arson. If you choose to indulge yourself, I promise not to tell. Really!!!

A hillbilly got married, and on his wedding night he calls his father for advice on what to do since he had never been intimate with a woman before. "We're in the bedroom Pa, what do we do now?" Thinking that nature will take its course, the father replied, "Take her clothes off and then...

Mom (Jan) Frazier's Beef Kabob Marinade I've been told I serve a pretty mean tri-tip, so here it goes; Mom (Jan) Frazier's Beef Kabob Marinade 1/2 Cup ketchup 1 teaspoon salt 1/2 teaspoon pepper 2 Tablespoons sugar 2 teaspoons mustard 2 Tablespoons soy sauce 1/4 Cup wine vinegar 2...