Lame Joke Thread

[Skylinerider]

What kind of shoes do child molesters wear?


White Vans

 

[tv_larsen]

I've been dating this girl, she really like going to museums and Taco Bell.
You could say she's kind of artsy-fartsy.

 

[Skylinerider]

What does a Thesaurus eat for breakfast?

A synonym roll.

 

[TRD270]

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?


Dam

 

[Pile of parts]

What did the other fish say?



Dumb bass!

 

[Kevin B.]

How do you lift an elephant with just one hand?

You can't, elephants don't have hands.

 

[Pile of parts]

This one works better said - never tried to write it but here it goes. Help me out and play along if you get it.


How do you get an elephant through a doorway?



Take the "D" out of door and the "F" out of way.....

 

[mesha]

This one works better said - never tried to write it but here it goes. Help me out and play along if you get it.


How do you get an elephant through a doorway?



Take the "D" out of door and the "F" out of way.....

There is no F in way

 

[Pile of parts]

There is no F in way

Yep, there's no f'in way you'll get an elephant through the door. (Thanks for playing along, Mesha)

 

[Pile of parts]

One from my 7 yr old nephew, over the Thanksgiving Holiday.

What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand?


Cuatro sinko

 

[McFate]

Want to determine the gender of an ant? It's simple: throw it into some water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it floats, that means it's buoyant.

 

[BlueWolfFab]

That's a nice ham you have there...

It'd be a shame if someone were to put an "s" in front and an "e" behind it..

 

[mesha]

That's a nice ham you have there...

It'd be a shame if someone were to put an "s" in front and an "e" behind it..

This joke KILLED me. hahahaha

 

[ID Bronco]

What do you call a Hot Chocolate lover?

A Cocoa Nut

From my 11 year old daughter

 

[BlueWolfFab]

I would like to thank my legs, for always supporting me, my arms, which were always by my side, and finally my fingers, I could always count on them.

 

[Hickey]

What kind of underwear does a cloud have?





Thunderwear!

 

[mesha]

A mom and son are having a conversation

Samuel, do you think I am a bad mom?



My name is James.

 

[jeeper]

Did you know all of the tickle me Elmo dolls are boys?


It's a requirement that the factory gives each doll a couple test tickles.

 

[mesha]

What can think the unthinkable?


An Ithberg

 

[glockman]

How much do dead batteries cost?

Nothing they are free of charge.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using Tapatalk