Lame Joke Thread

[mesha]

I got a whole bunch of eye rolls and moans

Thanks!

 

[mesha]

Why do orphans go to church?





so they have someone to call father😬

 

[mesha]

What goes ooooooooooo

A cow with no lips.

 

[Thursty]

What’s the difference between light and hard?


You can sleep with a light on.

 

[mesha]

My little sister started crying when my dad was cutting up onions...


onions was such a good dog.

 

[mesha]

My favorite book is the hunchback of notre dame.


I just love a protagonist with a twisted back story.

 

[Kevin B.]

I got a new universal remote control yesterday. This changes everything.

 

[4x4_Welder]

View attachment 134803

Did it all start when he lost his mother?

 

[Kevin B.]

My doctor: we had to remove your colon.

Me why?

 

[Pile of parts]

My doctor: we had to remove your colon.

Me why?

Took me a second.

 

[UNSTUCK]

Still thinking about it.

 

[Thursty]

If a red head works at a bakery, is he the gingerbread man?



If abortion is murder, are condoms kidnapping?

 

[moab_cj5]

 

[Kevin B.]

It's a little known fact that there are no canaries on the Canary Islands.

The same is true of the Virgin Islands. There's no canaries there either.

 

[Kevin B.]

This one works better in person, but you know what's really surprising?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!




Levitated the wife and boy about a foot off the couch last night.

 

[mighty midjet]

 

[Kevin B.]

My son kept chewing on the electrical cords, so I had to ground him.

He's currently conducting himself much better.

 

[4x4_Welder]

Sounds like that worked shockingly well.

 

[UNSTUCK]

OR

Was he shocked by your discipline methods?

 

[anderson750]

Joke just told to me by my 17 yo son


Why can’t orphans play baseball?

They dont know where home is.